Do your words give grace to those who hear them?

My mother has a very distinct southern accent. We’ve lived in Southern California since 1971 and her accent has thickened, not gone away. It is very sweet and endearing. When I went away to college I would mimic my mother’s accent and receive sought-after laughter and spotlight attention. I was funny when I was making fun of my mom’s accent.

Occasionally, I would come home for the weekend and bring some college friends with me. My mom really enjoyed these visits and, as any true-blue southerner would do, she’d cook up a storm and we’d eat well. We’d go back to college with cookies, breads and other edible delights to share with our not so fortunate fellow collegians. Everyone loved my mom, her accent and her cooking!

On one such visit, my friends demanded my mimic routine of my mom’s accent. Everyone, including mom hooted and hollered with delight. We carried on a bit more until my dad entertained us with a story of his childhood.

It wasn’t until a few years’ later I learned how insensitive and mocking the mimicking of my mother’s accent was to my mom & dad. My mom thought I was embarrassed by her accent and was making fun of her. I had hurt my mom without ever meaning to! We discussed it at great lengths and together learned of her sensitivity and my insecurity of not wanting to be myself (being afraid if I was myself, people wouldn’t like me). I asked my mom to forgive me for unintentionally hurting her. I also began a pursuit of figuring out who I was as a child of God.

My mom granted me permission to mimic her accent as a point of humor, understanding I had no intention of mocking her nor was I embarrassed by her accent. However, even now, I am careful to ensure my intention is not to mock or make fun of her.

This week, and last week at Pismo Beach, I’ve observed Christians loving each other, working on a discipleship relationship with each other and yet, being very unkind at times to each other. Guys mocking girls, girls mocking guys, girls mocking girls, people being disrespectful of others’ feelings, mentors being rude, students being unkind, disrespectful or mocking to their parents or others in leadership, etc.

I am convicted of my own neglect to confront critical attitudes, disrespectful/rude behavior and judgmental spirits as I hear or observe them around me. I am also convicted of my participation in these same attitudes, behaviors and spirits. Pray for me so I will show love by caring to confront these kinds of attitudes and be a right example reflecting the love of Christ.

Be kind to one another. Forgive one another.

Ephesians 4:29-32 Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. [Col. 3:8-But now you also, put them all aside: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech from your mouth. ] Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

Clarke’s Commentary Notes on Eph 4:31 -
Let all bitterness. It is astonishing that any who profess the Christian name should indulge bitterness of spirit. Those who are censorious, who are unmerciful to the failings of others, who have fixed a certain standard by which they measure all persons in all circumstances, and unchristian every one that does not come up to this standard, these have the bitterness against which the apostle speaks.
And clamor. Loud and obstreperous [noisily and stubbornly defiant] speaking, brawling, railing, boisterous talk, often the offspring of wrath; all of which are highly unbecoming the meek, loving, quiet, sedate mind of Christ and his followers.
And evil speaking. Blasphemy; that is, injurious speaking - words which tend to hurt those of whom or against whom they are spoken.
With all malice. All malignity; as anger produces wrath, and wrath clamor, so all together produce malice; that is, settled, sullen, fell wrath, which is always looking out for opportunities to revenge itself by the destruction of the object of its indignation.

As part of the body of Christ, we are commanded to love one another. How are you showing the love of Christ to your brothers and sisters in Christ? If you are being critical, judgmental or mocking them, you are being disobedient. Repent. Instead of seeking to change their actions, demeanor or attitudes with your caustic remarks, critical spirit or judgmental comments – ask God to change your heart and help you reflect Christ.

Are you kind, tenderhearted and forgiving of others? Do your words give grace to those who hear them? Consider. Reflect. Obey.

May I reflect Christ and not me!