Geometry (oh, no!)

Tis true…Frank may be-coming an "Emotional Girl" (which is a CW song by Terry Clark, right?). Or, maybe not.

I think I ShOuLD wIn ThE pRiZe FoR bEiNg An EmOtIoNaL gIrL. Or something. Honestly, I do not know how Frank puts up with me some time. It MUST be love. Daily, I thank God for blessing me with Frank. Based upon my poor performance last night (I EVEN scared Frank with my driving - now you KNOW things were bad!!!), I may be moved to the naughty list in Santa's book of Naughty and Nice people.

I am reliving the agony of Geometry through Jameson right now. So he would truly understand that I FEEL HIS PAIN and realize just HOW MUCH I struggled with Geometry, I shared my worst high school class moment with him. Ye want to hear it? Ga'head, feast yer eyes upon me most loathesome classroom trauma. Snicker if ye can, giggle if ye must…but know, yer mirth be at the expense of a fragile teenage lass who had yet to meet with failure to this point in her wee life.

I was blessed with loving school and doing well in high school. My parents NEVER had to remind me to do my homework, study for a test nor finish my quarterly reports or projects. I had an incredible ability to retain lectures and most random points of trivia. I had to work a tad harder on remembering important things read in the textbooks (especially when the teacher tested off the footnotes - tricksey teacher, that one!). But, all in all, I munched up lecture notes, textbooks and breathed out mostly A's and a rare B+. In fact, until my Junior year in High School, I had achieved a four-point-oh average! Then came Mrs. Mary Gallagher and the much needed Geometry class. My first mistake was scheduling Geometry for 5th period - which was right after lunch. My second mistake was, well, taking Geometry.

After the first week or two, I knew I was in deep trouble. I did not understand anything Mrs. Gallagher was teaching. Immediately, I went up to her after 5th period ended and asked to be moved to the front of the class. I knew if I was sitting in the front, I would HAVE to stay awake and not doze off with a full tummy, just after lunch. Mrs. Gallagher complied. A few day's later, our first test was returned. I had to recheck the name on the test Mrs. Gallagher handed me. I was in deep shock when I realized the red-circled "F" on my test really belonged to me. I had never failed anything in my life, up to this point. I squealed with dismay and Mrs. Gallagher said, "don't worry Mary, keep doing the homework and the problems in the chapter I don't assign, pay attention in class, ask questions and you'll be turning in passing grades in no time."

Oh, I believed! I was a true believer.

Faithfully, I did all the problems. I copied and recopied my notes. I went in early and stayed after school to listen to the Geometry Oracle: Mrs. Mary Gallagher. Mind you, Mrs. Gallagher was an excellent teacher! She had wit, charm and an ability to make you WANT to learn Geometry. She would always give us "real life" examples where we might apply our Geometry proofs, theorums and miscellaneous recipes of the arithmetic persuasion. She was the maven…the siren…the soothing voice of reason wooing me on to try, try and try again!

It began to dawn on me that I might be mentally retarded. Logic reasoned this could not be true as I had no problem with Algebra I, Biology, Chemistry, Honors English, etc. However, logic failed me and departed the moment I stepped across the threshold of Mrs. Gallagher's classroom.

One day, I believe I had something akin to a mental meltdown. Adrift upon the sea of proofs and geometrical verbiage, I was floundering and mentally drowning. Mrs. Gallagher finished her opening joke of the hour and launched into yet another block of proofs upon which we had to build to accurately record within our 52 reasons why this particular angle was EXACTLY like another angle and shared the same midline….or something or other. My eyes glazed over, began to fill and a high-pitched whimper escaped my mouth. Just then, Mrs. Gallagher gazed in my direction and the EXACTLY duplicate rivers of tears began to stream silently down my cheeks (I could certainly give her over 1,000 reasons proving why my tears were symmetrical). Mrs. Gallagher calmly approached me, rested her warm hand upon my quivering shoulder, instructed the class to do a set of problems on page such and such, and then squatted down beside me and assured me I was going to get this and not to worry. Not to worry? Like a blubbering child, I told Mrs. Gallagher, in-between sobs, that I was NOT understanding a word she was saying. I pretty much worked myself up into quite the scene of blinding tears, snot-dripping nose and purplish-red face. Mrs. Gallagher excused me to the nurse and asked me to come see her after school. I fled.

I don't think I've ever duplicated that scene again in my life to date. I've been through some fairly traumatic things…but apparently, they pale in comparison to my lack of understanding of Geometry and the subsequently first semester failing grade. Pretty amazing, huh?

I don't recall that my parents ever got upset.

Well, Mrs. Gallagher agreed to tutor me every day after class and all through the Winter Break. She was an angel. Geometry was the devil incarnate. In fact, I would go so far as to imagine the fallen angel must truly be all sharp angles and proof-ridden obtuse triangles.

Mrs. Gallagher agreed to average my entire Geometry grade and report it for both semesters. You see, I received an "F" for the 1st semester of Geometry. However, I did receive an "A" for the 2nd semester. So, I passed Geometry with a "C" (a C flat, if you must know!).

Jameson gets all of my compassion, sympathy and "attaboys" for taking Geometry his freshman year. I only pray he can do better than I.

God help him. Indeed.

In actual fact, I do believe Geometry should NOT be a requirement for those wanting to pursue college. I think there should be an offering of "Geometry-lite" for those not EVER needing Geometry ever again (like say, 99.9% of the Earth's population!).

Hm, sounds like a solid political platform, eh?

dogledanje!!!