Words: Healing vs. Destroying

Have you ever wanted to blast someone with your words?

Have you ever wanted to say awful things to hurt someone!??

Have you ever, in anger or pain, let your mouth run off until you cried or screamed in frustration!!???

Have you ever blown up at someone and fired off words, hurling insults and mean accusations!!!????

Have you ever been so angry that words seemed inadequate and you wanted to physically throttle someone?

 

That was me.

 

Yesterday, in fact.

 

I confess.

 

Please don't ask me the details, because I won't tell you, but someone verbally attacked, insulted and wrongfully maligned Frank.  One of the many things I love about Frank, though it frustrates me to no end, at times, is that if he knows the accusations are incorrect, wrong or flat out lies...he won't defend himself. 

 

Ever. 

 

Nope, not ever.

 

He will not retaliate in anger.  He will not treat that person any differently than he did before.  One of the quotes he likes to use to remind me of how pointless response is in a matter like this, "when you start thowing dirt, you begin to lose ground."  He also believes God knows the truth of the matter and his heart.  He ultimately wants to please God inwardly and outwardly.  It matters MORE to him what God thinks than what people think.  Gulp.

 

What a HUGE testimony that is to me.

 

Really.
 

Given the time and emotional energy (anger in this instance), I can write a scathing response, enlightening the person (as to what an absolute inbecilic moron they are) and robustly educate them of the truth in the matter.  I was so blinded with anger when Frank explained to me on the phone what happened, I didn't hear him ask me not to contact this person.  Or, if I heard him, I chose to ignore him (disobey, in fact).  In this instance, writing was not a cartharsis for me.  And, I was at work.  I was suppose to be working.

 

On the way home I dialed up a number for this person I had stored on my cell.  Thankfully, the number was no longer working.  At that moment, a huge gust of wind made my car tremble.  The wind ALWAYS makes me think about the Holy Spirit.  Like an arrow piercing my heart, I was convicted of my sinful anger.  I was convicted of not trusting God in this matter and leaving it with Him.  I confessed my anger, lack of trust and asked God to help me encourage Frank when I got home.

 

Frank was relieved that I had not called this person.  He was also relieved I hadn't sent them anything in writing.  He reminded me that he had asked me not to do any of that.  And, reinforcing his command, he said it again.  He DID say I could write a letter, and get everything out, but not send it.

 

He believes, in time, the truth of the matter will come to light.  And, even if it doesn't, he knows the truth and is comforted by the fact God knows the truth.  Frank is WAY more mature than me!

 

I've destroyed the letter.

I've asked God to forgive me for my anger, disobeying my husband and not trusting Him.

I've also forgiven this person, which is really hard, but right and pleasing to God.

 

Today's PW Devotional is so timely (surprise).  Thankfully, I was prevented from unleashing the harm my words could've done in this situation.  God's way is ALWAYS better.

 

Always.

 

Really.

 

Oh yeah, and on the forgiveness thing...read what God has to say about forgiving others:

Matthew 6:14-15 "For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. (15) "But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.

Matthew 18:21-35 Then Peter came and said to Him, "Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?" (22) Jesus *said to him, "I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven. vss. 23 - 31 is the parable about the king who settled accounts with his slaves.  One slave begged to be forgiven a great debt.  The king forgave the debt.  The forgiven slave went to a fellow slave who owed him money and though the fellow slaved begged for more time to repay the debt, the forgiven slave had him thrown into prison.  The king was told of this wrong and ... (32) "Then summoning him, his lord *said to him, 'You wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. (33) 'Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?' (34) "And his lord, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he should repay all that was owed him. (35) "My heavenly Father will also do the same to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart."

Mark 11:25 "Whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father who is in heaven will also forgive you your transgressions.

Ephesians 4:29-32 Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification [edification literally means for the building up; in figurative sense "for the promotion of growth in the Christian life"] according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. (30) Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. (31) Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. (32) Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

Though I already know Eph. 4:32...I plan to memorize Eph. 4:29-32.  May the Lord bring these verses to mind in all situations!!!  Why not memorize these verses along with me? 

 

Read on...

PlanetWisdom.com Devotionals

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Words Matter: The Payoff Posted: 21 Apr 2010 11:53 AM PDT "From the fruit of his lips a man is filled with good things as surely as the work of his hands rewards him." (Proverbs 12:14) When your working life consists of part-time jobs, it's all about the hours. My friend T. works three jobs; he wants all the hours he can get his hands on. He's got car insurance, and he's saving for a truck. The math is easy: More hours = more dollars. Today's proverb builds a bridge between work and words. Working hours brings cash rewards. Working at speaking good words brings a payoff, too, though it's not always as obvious and sometimes it's even harder than pulling another shift. Kind words. Wise words. Timely words. Right words. Prayerful words. Worthless words left unsaid. They all contribute to better relationships, problem solving, contentment, leadership and -- surprise! -- communication. Good words payoff in a richer life. Think: How have the words you've spoken this week hurt or benefited your life? How could choosing wiser or more encouraging words in the week ahead payoff in a real improvement in a key relationship? Pray: Ask God to help the words you say to be beneficial to Him, to those who hear you, and to yourself, as well. Do: Listen this week for words from others that either cost them something good or provide something good for them or someone else.

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Mary E.Hickcox
www.CalvaryBaptistSM.org
http://mary-neotes.blogspot.com/