.u.N.t.H.i.N.k.A.b.L.e.

Yeah, I know, it is NOT like leprosy or anything (reminds me of a song...where is THAT tape???).

None-the-less...I am a pariah to my world right now. Pariah (go look it up if you don't know the meaning..I'm a bit tired and not willing to tax my brain too much).

I just went on line to Web MD and discovered that one of my symptoms could be "confusion, delirium..."! And, I drove myself to the doctor yesterday!!!

Yes, I did. I showed up to the urgent-care-clinic at 12:55 p.m, only to be told that they couldn't see me until after 4 p.m. and had I tried trying to get in to see my PCP? With tears rolling down my unmakeup'd face (yes, I felt just that badly), I informed the none-caring receptionist that my doc was booked solid and couldn't see me, hence my tear-streaked presence. "Come back after 4 p.m." I even pulled the "I work at CHOC and am one of your kindred" VIP cards, to no avail.

At 3:52 p.m., feeling like my body had been used as a punching bag (for aggressive, crazy monkeys) and a soccer ball (for elephants) and, in fact, one elephant remained perched upon my chest (making it difficult to breathe) I waited to be seen by a very witty, Dr. Smith. He told me to take a deep breath, while putting that ice-cold stethoscope onto my back...causing an onslaught of yucky, painful, wet coughing (sorry to gross some of y'all out, but it lends to the storyline). He said, "yep, there is a crackle in the LLL." Which, for you non-healthcare types, LLL=lower left lobe. And, for you non anatomy types, "lower left lobe" is talking about my left lung.

Well, now that we have that resolved, I thought, he'd prescribe some antibiotic for bronchitis and I'd be on my way. Then, he said the UNTHINKABLE (whence the title of my blog), "you have pneumonia." I laughed and said, "Nooooooooooooooo! You're kidding me, right?" At this point, he wasn't in a witty mood, nor in a joking manner, because he looked at me dead seriously and said, "Yes, you have pneumonia."

Sheesh. Off to radiology to get a picture of the offending LLL (for translation, see above). The radiologist (who looked 10 years younger than me...can I become a radiologist???), informed me she gets pneumonia all the time. Oh, that helps me quite a bit.

Back to Dr. Smith to review my film with me (he was way cool like that). He pointed out my perfect right lung and the crisp curve at the bottom of my lung (which is healthy). For comparision, he pointed out my left lung and the offensive "shredded looking" horizontal line at the bottom. This guy is all seriousness. No joke was appropriate at this time...but I just had to say, "maybe I somehow disclocated that part of my lung and it is just free-floating in my body cavity." Which, now when you think about it, is way worse and grosser than having pneumonia. He ignored my comment and showed me where the fluid was. That would explain the feeling of the elephant sitting on my chest.

Bed rest, antibiotics, cough syrup with codeine (would kill Frank if he took any) and out of work until March 13. Ugh.

Bed rest is sounding pretty good about now. My advice to y'all, try not to get pneumonia. It pretty much wipes you out, not to mention the elephants or aggressive, crazy monkeys (see way above for translation). Must be that delirium setting in again.

Who's to blame for this "infectious community acquired pneumonia"? I'll take a mild stand and accuse my cousin James. He was quite ill and running a fever when we hugged him hello back in Longview for my Aunt Helen's funeral. At least, Dr. Smith seems to think it was Cousin James.

Dr. Smith. Danger Wil Robinson. OOOmph, I'm too tired to launch that bit of analogy. Aren't you glad? :o)

So, a bit of prayer for me would be swell. And, please pray for Frank that he doesn't get this hideous thing I have. That'd be swell too.

I miss you guys!

And, I love you all.

Off to beddy-bye for me.